We have twin daughters who have just turned 4. One does not wear a nappy now which is a new thing over the last week. Her twin sister becomes embarrassed if her nappy is wet not dry in the morning. We are really encouraging that its ok and tell her not to worry but she automatically feels embarrassed because her sister has had dry nappies and now does not wear one. We have not wanted to ignore and acknowledge that one is doing well without her nappies but do not go overboard as am worried the attention she is getting whilst the other is still having wet nappies. any suggestions would be welcomed.
Regardless of whether or not she understands that it is normal for a 4-year-old girl to be wetting the bed at night – the fact that her twin sister no longer does is what really matters to her! Our genes play a major role in deciding who wets the bed – so with a bit of luck she too will soon be experiencing dry nights! In the meantime we need to think of ways to help her to feel confident about herself and to move her focus away from the bedwetting. The first thing is to replace her nappies with DryNites – these are specifically designed for older children and she will no doubt love the butterfly design. We had a little friend over for a sleepover the other night and although she no longer wets the bed asked me if she could wear a pair of the DryNites that she had seen on the shelf in my study!! It is important that we acknowledge all successes in our children’s lives no matter how small – so by all means be happy for your other daughter although it is important that both girls understand that the fact that one is dry and the other not is just a matter of luck rather than being clever or smart. Bedwetting is something children have very little control over. Now is the time to point out all those things in her life she does well and perhaps discuss how the girls do things differently – one may be great at drawing people while the other may love to paint! Sometimes when we embrace differences it helps us to feel much better about ourselves. You can also encourage healthy bladder habits by making sure she is drinking enough during the day, limiting the amount of caffeine in her diet, ensuring she fully empties her bladder each time she goes to the toilet – this means stopping those ‘just in case’ trips to the toilet, as well as avoiding dairy products at night.